Divorce Mediation

When Considering Divorce Do You Move Out of the Marital Home or Do You Stay?

Marital HomeWhen considering a divorce, it's possible that your situation makes it incredibly difficult to continue cohabitating in the marital home. This is especially true if the circumstances surrounding the split are acrimonious, but it may simply be that you're experiencing an undue amount of stress and would like to have some more space.

Does that mean that you should move? It may not make sense to do so in all situations, and it is never wise to make a major change, like moving out of the house, on the spur of the moment. Instead, it may make sense to consider how moving out of the marital home might affect divorce proceedings.

For instance, consider that moving out of the home may provide your soon-to-be ex-spouse with exclusive access to the property. He or she may be able to get an order that grants temporary exclusive possession of the home. This means that the other partner cannot return there. 

Consider that even if such a motion isn't granted, you'll probably have to leave some of your personal possessions at the residence. Do you trust your former spouse to provide proper care of these items? Additionally, do you trust your partner not to cause serious damage to the structure, thereby hurting the home's value on the market if it must be sold?

It's also worth considering whether or not moving out of the marital home might affect your custody rights. Leaving your children in the home with the other partner indicates to the court that you consider that individual to be a fit parent. Accordingly, your spouse now has de facto custody of the minor children. If you have any concerns about your partner's ability to be an effective parent, then it is rarely advisable to risk moving out of the family home before custody issues are decided. 

If domestic violence has played any role in your relationship with your former partner, then it is always wise to seek somewhere else to live. However, in all other situations, it is almost always recommended to remain in the home until settlement of the divorce.

If you are considering a divorce and are wondering whether or not you should move out of the family home, contact the Sabra Law Group at 646-472-7971. With a focus on mediating the toughest marriage dissolution questions, legal professionals are prepared to help you make a wise and informed decision.

 

Why Divorce Can Be a Win-Win for Both Parties

DIvorce can be a win-win Forget all troubles. Gloomy thoughtful beautiful woman folding her legs and sitting in the arm chair while her husband sitting in the backgroundDivorce has a reputation for being an acrimonious and litigious process. Fortunately, it doesn't have to be that way. With mediation in New York, divorce can be a win-win.

That may be difficult to believe. Anger, sadness, and confusion can make a divorce feel like a never-ending battle. If both of the parties can shift their focus to an outcome that is positive for everyone involved, then they may discover that their thought processes become more rational. Instead of becoming mired in the turmoil of the present, they begin to see a future in which both former partners and their children are flourishing.

Deciding to litigate a divorce frequently leads to increased rancor. Unfortunately, many people believe that the courtroom is the only place to decide issues like spousal support, child support, and child custody. Divorce can be a win-win when couples choose mediation in New York instead.

Mediation is a collaborative process that has spouses working together to resolve issues in a constructive manner. This makes the process far less emotionally draining on the former partners and their children.

A trained mediator listens to the viewpoints of both parties on each issue. And the mediator helps the parties to hear and understand each side’s perspective and facilitates a conversation so that they can reach decisions on each of the issues that are acceptable to everyone. It is rewarding and helpful for the family to feel that they have a voice and that they are being heard. The mediation process even lets each partner actively participate in making decisions. This is a vast improvement over having a judge dictate decisions with which neither party may agree.

Through the mediation process, divorcing couples may learn more effective communication techniques that will serve them in the coming years, particularly if a relationship must be maintained for the sake of any shared children. It's valuable to know that even at an emotionally difficult time it is possible to work together to find common-sense solutions. 

Just as importantly, divorce resolutions can be reached in far less time than litigation requires. This makes it possible for everyone to begin focusing on their new lives much sooner, and that's a win-win for the whole family as it allows for faster healing.

If you would like to learn more about how divorce can be a win-win with mediation in New York, contact the Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971. A collaborative process will put your family on the path to healing.

 

How to Reach a Win-Win Resolution in Your Marriage

Win-Win Communication

 

Conflict is a natural part of all human relationships. It's simply unrealistic to assume that you and your partner will always be in perfect accord. 

Moreover, conflict can be incredibly healthy, especially if it is concluded with a win-win resolution. This means settling a conflict can bring the two of you closer together and strengthen your relationship. 

Unfortunately, many relationships are rife with poor conflict resolution. Couples may fight and then hold a grudge for years without ever resolving the situation. Alternatively, they avoid the uncomfortable topic by sweeping it under the rug. Other couples freeze up with conflict, going through the motions of their relationship without feeling anything inside. 

A successful marriage requires the ability to forgive and forget, to move forward while letting the little things go. All of this needs dedication to a win-win resolution in every conflict. This doesn't necessarily mean that both partners get everything they want every time. That is an unrealistic expectation. 

It does mean that both partners maintain a commitment to treating each other with respect and decency. Even in the midst of a conflict, they stay close to each other. They tackle the issue rather than each other. 

By keeping a focus on the problem it's possible to disagree while still remaining connected and engaged. Each partner is committed to solving the problem in a manner that demonstrates how much they love and care for the other partner. One partner's goal isn't for him to "win" at all costs. Instead, both of their goals are for the marriage to win. 

Negotiation is the hallmark of most successful marriages. It requires that each partner do some deep reflection on what's really important to them in any conflict. In other words, what is their goal and why is it so vital to them? Then, these reasons must be articulated to their partner. With this approach, it is possible for both partners to understand and acknowledge the viewpoint of the other. 

Many couples discover that they occupy more common ground than they realized before. This facilitates a healthy and relatively fair negotiation in which both partners get a bit of what they wanted and understand the other better in the process. 

If you would like to learn more about how to achieve a win-win resolution in your marriage or as you work to amicably dissolve it, contact the Sabra Law Group at 646-472-7971.

The 5 Warning Signs That May Lead to Divorce If Not Resolved

5 Warning Signs That May Lead to Divorce

Don’t end up caught off guard if your spouse tells you that he/she wants a divorce; know what warning signs to look for so you are not taken by surprise.

  1. Cheating/Infidelity:  This is one of the top predictors of divorce.  When one partner is cheating, there usually is a bigger problem.  The bigger problem can equate to “unmet needs” or other issues in the marriage that remain unresolved. It is essential to get to the bottom of the reason behind the infidelity to determine if your marriage issues are resolvable or not.
  2. Lack of Communication: If you and your spouse barely talk or cannot have deep conversations about important issues; then you need to figure out what can be done to change the breakdown in communication.  If you are committed to your marriage, then seek professional help if you are not able to come to a resolution with your spouse.   Effective and open communication is the backbone of any successful relationship. 
  3. Money Matters: A lot of marriages break up due to money problems.  Whether it’s that one spouse spends too much, or the other spouse does not manage money well; it can definitely lead to conflict.  Furthermore, if couples do not see eye-to-eye on money and have different views on money; it can cause friction in a marriage.
  4. Always Fighting:  Arguing and fighting is another major cause of divorce.  It causes unnecessary stress and if it keeps happening all too frequently, one partner is bound to get frustrated and want out of the marriage.  Seeking professional help to see if this is an issue that can be resolved may thwart off divorce. If there is no resolve; then it may be better to part ways for the sake of everyone’s well-being. 
  5. Lack of Health:  This can have many different meanings.  Lack of health can pertain to letting yourself go and stop taking care of yourself and your health; resulting in weight gain.  Weight gain can lead to depression or intimacy issues. In rare cases, it can also mean that one partner is ill, and the other partner chooses to exit the marriage instead of staying and taking care of their spouse.

 

Considering Divorce? Be Well-Informed So That You Can Make the Right Decision

 

Contact Sabra Law Group today for a confidential consultation at (646) 472-7971 and get answers to all of your divorce-related questions.

How to Have Win-Win Mediation for Your Divorce

win-win mediation Divorce is never easy. It's an emotionally draining process that is painful for everyone involved. This is especially true in cases where couples decide to litigate the outcome. 

Too often, separating spouses believe that the courtroom is the only place to resolve complicated divorce issues like child support, visitation and the division of the marital assets. The reality is that mediation frequently is the far better alternative. 

Mediation is much less expensive than going to court will ever be. Plus, it's an extraordinarily private process that doesn't involve much in the way of public court filings. Mediation also is a more amicable and mature way to resolve conflicts. 

When the issues between a divorcing couple can be resolved via mediation, it is a win-win for the whole family. Of course, both of the former partners must be willing to come to the table and to keep their minds open. This isn't always easy, but a win-win mediation is possible when both enter the process with good intentions. 

Much of mediation is about negotiation and compromise. Accordingly, it is vital that both parties not be overly focused on getting their way. A better approach and one that is more likely to result in a win-win mediation is to consider what is in the best interests of the family. 

When children are involved, they frequently are the deciding factor in this determination. Throughout the process, the main concern of the parents is rightfully placed on the health and well-being of the children. When parents remember that less strife and more compassion are likely to favorably affect their children and provide them with a strong model for how to lead a healthy and well-adjusted life, then they are more likely to enter mediation with the best of intentions. 

Still, this doesn't mean that divorce mediation is always easy. Emotions sometimes run high, and occasionally the participants lose sight of the greater good. At these moments, it's wise to take a step back and a deep breath. Refocus your energy on creating a positive outcome that is good for everyone, rather than just for yourself. 

Call the Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971 to learn more about how a win-win mediation is possible in even the most complex of divorce cases. With a skilled attorney and a compassionate mediator, it is possible for the family to heal and move forward in a positive manner.

 

How to De-Stress During the Holidays When Facing Divorce

De-Stress During the HolidaysEven if you are facing divorce during the holidays, there are many ways to make your holidays less stressful.  We all know that the holidays are such a hectic time; family coming into town, children out of school, holiday shopping, parties, and many other holiday-related festivities.  Master how to de-stress during the holidays when facing divorce and have a wonderful holiday season. 

 

Learn How to Successfully Navigate the Holiday Season While Staying Cool, Calm and Collected by Following the 5 Tips Below:

 

  1. Be mindful on what you already have on your plate or your “to do” list:  Try not to take on more than you can handle.  This is essential not just during the holidays but in any life scenario.  It is important to know your limits and only say “yes” to what you can comfortably handle.  Realize that it is okay to say “no” sometimes.  The more you practice saying “no” the more comfortable you will become with saying “no”. 
  2. Try a form of self-care:  Creating space for yourself while reading a book, or going for a walk, trying aromatherapy by visiting your favorite spa for a massage and/or aromatherapy treatment or create your own spa at home.  Creating your own spa at home is as simple as going to Bath and Body Works and investing in one of their aromatherapy collection oils, creams, lotions, or bubble bath.   Get some scented candles and a glass of your favorite wine or beverage and turn on your favorite music.  Spend at least one hour treating yourself to some self-care once a week and you will feel rejuvenated.
  3. Make time for fun:  Plan a fun outing with your favorite friends; a wine dinner, comedy show, bowling, ice skating or even dancing.  Spending time with friends that make you laugh and smile will have a therapeutic effect on your well-being. 
  4. Don’t take things personally:  Letting little things get to you will bring your energy down. Traffic may be bad, your spouse may be cranky, your children may be testing your patience; however, how you react to it will determine your stress level.  Train yourself to become more easygoing and not let every little thing get to you.  In other words, choose your battles carefully…as not everything is worth getting upset about. 
  5. Set a plan in advance for when and how to talk about divorce:  Talk with your spouse now, if you can, or reach an agreement to perhaps put off the details of divorce until after the holidays. It can be tough to find time to make big decisions in your divorce when children are involved.  Remember, if you have children and they will be home from school focus on what you can do to make the transition easier for them during the holidays.   Focusing on your children during the holidays and having a plan lined up for when and how you will get through the difficult divorce conversations post-holiday season will help ease your stress. 

 

If you are dealing with divorce during the holidays, contact Sabra Law Group for a consultation at (646) 472-7971.  Sabra can help you put together an action plan so you can stress less and focus on your children. 

25 Tips for Dealing with Conflict in Marriage and Relationships

Conflict in Marriage

Healthy relationships are an essential part of life. Relationships include the casual to the familial as well as romantic . People enter such relationships, with the best of intentions.

However, as time goes by, disagreements are bound to occur in any relationship and usually everyone tries to make it work. When conflicts arise in an intimate relationship, in a marriage, such discord does not necessarily lead to ending a relationship, but it can be a very compelling reason. If you value the person you are with, whether in a relationship or by marriage, then you will try to heal the discord.

Here are some very helpful tips for revitalizing your relationship with your partner and help you deal with conflict in marriage:

  1. Listen to them sincerely (with an open heart and no judgment).
  2. Try to look at things from their point of view. Be curious.  Ask them questions about their point of view to get a clearer understanding.
  3. Pay attention and truly listen to them when they speak to you.
  4. Be mindful of their likes and dislikes.
  5. Be respectful of their opinions.
  6. Establish boundaries with your partner by discussing and defining them together.
  7. Live by the “rules” as much as your partner.
  8. Don’t play the blame game.
  9. Find things you like in common.
  10. Plan your future together.
  11. Always give as much space as required to your partner.
  12. Do not snoop on your partner.
  13. Trust them to be honest and act in kind.
  14. Be honest about your feelings.
  15. Try to look at things objectively.
  16. Don’t be overly selfish or overly sacrificing, be sincere and honor your needs.
  17. Discord is good if you can find common ground.
  18. In arguments, remain calm and practical.
  19. Ensure all duties are shared fairly.
  20. Reward your partner with affection.
  21. Be appreciative of the things they do for you, particularly the small things.
  22. Consider how life would be without them. Look at all of the areas of your life where they have added value (this may require a real hard honest look).
  23. Establish relationship goals together.
  24. Know clearly what your partner wants and be clear about your wants.
  25. In extremes, seek couples counseling, therapy,  or relationship coaching.

Where Can You Find the Best Divorce Mediation Attorney In NYC?

It can happen that despite your best intentions and efforts, a marriage is not going the way you want and you see no movement in the direction that you want the relationship to go. In such cases, parting ways can be a very sensible option. If you are looking for the best divorce mediation attorney in NYC, Sabra Law Group is one of the most well-known divorce law experts. Sabra can help you reach an amicable split with your spouse that addresses and resolves all of the issues. Contact Sabra Law Group now at 646-472-7971 and let her firm help you take back control of your life!

How to Plan for Retirement When Going Through a Divorce in New York

Divorce in New York

Going through a divorce can be a very difficult thing. This is especially true if you are nearing retirement. In such cases, you have to bear the risk of losing out on a significant portion of your savings. However, this does not need to be the case. With the right kind of legal guidance and prudent planning, you can protect your retirement fund. Here are some important factors to consider:

  1. Pre-Nuptial Agreement

In this day and age where almost half of all marriages in the US end in divorces, it is completely negligent to not have a prenup. While you might enter into a matrimonial bond purely based on romantic feelings, that does not exempt you from being prudent. However, most divorce cases do not have a prenup and if you are reading this, then, while it is probably already too late for a prenup, a post-nuptial agreement may be appropriate. Nevertheless, any person looking to get married should invest in a prenup that protects them, their assets and their children in case of divorce.

  1. Grounds for Divorce

During the hearing of a divorce case, it is very important to explain its cause. For example, if your spouse has had an adulterous relationship, then that is certainly grounds for divorce. Further, you can protect your finances from being split up with your former spouse. However, you are going to need sound professional advice in order to make that happen.

  1. The Agreement

It may happen that you want to get a divorce, but your spouse does not. Or it can be the case that your spouse has filed for divorce and now you might lose part of your savings. In such situations, you should seek out legal help as soon as possible. The details of every case are unique as are the people who are going to be advocating for each side. The best way to come out on top is to hire reputable and experienced divorce lawyers who can negotiate a favorable divorce agreement on your behalf.

Where Can You Get Legal Help to Plan for Retirement and Divorce in New York?

Sabra Law Group is one of the leading divorce specialists in New York. Sabra has helped countless clients resolve their divorces with the least impact possible on their retirement plans. Ensure your freedom and future security comes at the least possible price. Call 646-472-7971 and book an appointment with Sabra today!

The 5 Key Steps to Healthy Relationships and Marriage

5 Key Steps to Healthy Relationships

Maintaining a healthy relationship does not come easy.  It takes a collaborative effect from both partners to maintain a healthy relationship.

Learn the 5 Key Steps to Healthy Relationships

  1. Accept them for who they are: As you date someone and get to know them better, you will discover things about them that you don’t admire.  It is important to remember to still treat them with respect and understand that you may not always agree on everything.  They may have their own belief systems, values and ways of unique dealing with situations; cherish their point of view and be open to see things from their perspective.
  2. Meet the basic needs of a relationship:  People choose to be in a relationship for many reasons.  Some reasons include love, affection, emotional support and friendship.  For other people, their basic needs may be more elaborate, therefore, it is imperative to really listen to your partner and learn what is essential to their needs.
  3. The ability to forgive:  People are human and do make mistakes.  In a relationship, it is important to forgive.  The ability to forgive your partner is what allows you to move forward in the relationship.   It also prevents feelings of resentment.
  4. The ability to solve problems:  Every relationship will encounter problems but it is how one handles complex situations that determines the outcome.  By making a conscious effort to solve conflict and problems in a relationship and getting past the issues is a great way to maintain a healthy relationship.  Furthermore, it can even bring you closer together.
  5. Apologize when you are in the wrong: Apologize quickly when you know you have done something wrong to upset your partner.  Taking too long to acknowledge that you did something wrong will make matters worse.  Part of having any healthy relationship is the ability to communicate honestly and effectively.

Are You in an Unhealthy Relationship or Marriage?

If you are in an unhealthy relationship or marriage, and have done your best to make it work, it may be time to explore other options.  Ask your partner if they are willing to go to couples’ counseling, relationship coaching and to learn how to make adjustments in their (and your) behavior for the sake of the relationship.  If all else fails, it may be time to move on, close the chapter on this relationship and then move on to a healthier relationship.

If you have questions about divorce or divorce mediation, contact Sabra Law Group today for a confidential consultation at (646) 472-7971.

5 Tactics On Dealing with Conflict During Divorce

Dealing With Conflict During a Divorce in New York

 

Mastering the skill of resolving conflict and effective communication is essential when it comes to maintaining a healthy relationship.  One of the main reasons people end up divorcing is that they are unable to resolve their conflicts in an effective manner. 

 

It may be common for one partner to withdraw while the other one makes countless efforts to have a meaningful conversation.  One partner resorts to the “silent treatment” and the other partner wants to talk through the problematic issues.

 

Try to Implement The 5 Tactics Below to Minimize Conflict During the Divorce Process:

 

  1.  Don’t Be Overly Critical:  It is easier to get your point across by stating more of what you would like to see; rather than blaming your spouse for what they never do. 
  2. Take Accountability for Your Actions:  If you know that you were a bit too harsh with your spouse, realize that an apology may be warranted.  By apologizing for your bad attitude, it helps change the whole response that you will get from your spouse.
  3. Don’t Take Your Anger Out On Your Spouse:  Even if your spouse is the primary reason that you are so angry, it is best to stay calm.  When dealing with a divorce, you will have to discuss many difficult topics and it will be easier to come to terms if you can both do so calmly. 
  4. Watch Your Tone and Sarcasm:  Even if you are not yelling at your spouse, it is imperative to watch your tone.  If your tone is sarcastic or condescending, it may set your spouse off. 
  5. Don’t Be Defensive: Even if you really believe that you are right and your spouse is wrong, don’t show it by being defensive.  It is important to remember that there are two versions to every story and their version may not match yours. 

 

If you are having difficulty with discussing important issues regarding child custody, child support, and division of assets with your spouse, consult a Manhattan Divorce Mediator. 

 

Contact Sabra Law Group Today for a Divorce Discovery Session

 

Sabra Sasson has years of experience helping divorcing couples work through difficult issues that arise during divorce with a favorable outcome.  Call Sabra today at (646) 472-7971.  She can help you with dealing with conflict during your divorce process.