Divorce Mediation

25 Tips for Dealing with Conflict in Marriage and Relationships

Conflict in Marriage

Healthy relationships are an essential part of life. Relationships include the casual to the familial as well as romantic . People enter such relationships, with the best of intentions.

However, as time goes by, disagreements are bound to occur in any relationship and usually everyone tries to make it work. When conflicts arise in an intimate relationship, in a marriage, such discord does not necessarily lead to ending a relationship, but it can be a very compelling reason. If you value the person you are with, whether in a relationship or by marriage, then you will try to heal the discord.

Here are some very helpful tips for revitalizing your relationship with your partner and help you deal with conflict in marriage:

  1. Listen to them sincerely (with an open heart and no judgment).
  2. Try to look at things from their point of view. Be curious.  Ask them questions about their point of view to get a clearer understanding.
  3. Pay attention and truly listen to them when they speak to you.
  4. Be mindful of their likes and dislikes.
  5. Be respectful of their opinions.
  6. Establish boundaries with your partner by discussing and defining them together.
  7. Live by the “rules” as much as your partner.
  8. Don’t play the blame game.
  9. Find things you like in common.
  10. Plan your future together.
  11. Always give as much space as required to your partner.
  12. Do not snoop on your partner.
  13. Trust them to be honest and act in kind.
  14. Be honest about your feelings.
  15. Try to look at things objectively.
  16. Don’t be overly selfish or overly sacrificing, be sincere and honor your needs.
  17. Discord is good if you can find common ground.
  18. In arguments, remain calm and practical.
  19. Ensure all duties are shared fairly.
  20. Reward your partner with affection.
  21. Be appreciative of the things they do for you, particularly the small things.
  22. Consider how life would be without them. Look at all of the areas of your life where they have added value (this may require a real hard honest look).
  23. Establish relationship goals together.
  24. Know clearly what your partner wants and be clear about your wants.
  25. In extremes, seek couples counseling, therapy,  or relationship coaching.

Where Can You Find the Best Divorce Mediation Attorney In NYC?

It can happen that despite your best intentions and efforts, a marriage is not going the way you want and you see no movement in the direction that you want the relationship to go. In such cases, parting ways can be a very sensible option. If you are looking for the best divorce mediation attorney in NYC, Sabra Law Group is one of the most well-known divorce law experts. Sabra can help you reach an amicable split with your spouse that addresses and resolves all of the issues. Contact Sabra Law Group now at 646-472-7971 and let her firm help you take back control of your life!

How to Plan for Retirement When Going Through a Divorce in New York

Divorce in New York

Going through a divorce can be a very difficult thing. This is especially true if you are nearing retirement. In such cases, you have to bear the risk of losing out on a significant portion of your savings. However, this does not need to be the case. With the right kind of legal guidance and prudent planning, you can protect your retirement fund. Here are some important factors to consider:

  1. Pre-Nuptial Agreement

In this day and age where almost half of all marriages in the US end in divorces, it is completely negligent to not have a prenup. While you might enter into a matrimonial bond purely based on romantic feelings, that does not exempt you from being prudent. However, most divorce cases do not have a prenup and if you are reading this, then, while it is probably already too late for a prenup, a post-nuptial agreement may be appropriate. Nevertheless, any person looking to get married should invest in a prenup that protects them, their assets and their children in case of divorce.

  1. Grounds for Divorce

During the hearing of a divorce case, it is very important to explain its cause. For example, if your spouse has had an adulterous relationship, then that is certainly grounds for divorce. Further, you can protect your finances from being split up with your former spouse. However, you are going to need sound professional advice in order to make that happen.

  1. The Agreement

It may happen that you want to get a divorce, but your spouse does not. Or it can be the case that your spouse has filed for divorce and now you might lose part of your savings. In such situations, you should seek out legal help as soon as possible. The details of every case are unique as are the people who are going to be advocating for each side. The best way to come out on top is to hire reputable and experienced divorce lawyers who can negotiate a favorable divorce agreement on your behalf.

Where Can You Get Legal Help to Plan for Retirement and Divorce in New York?

Sabra Law Group is one of the leading divorce specialists in New York. Sabra has helped countless clients resolve their divorces with the least impact possible on their retirement plans. Ensure your freedom and future security comes at the least possible price. Call 646-472-7971 and book an appointment with Sabra today!

The 5 Key Steps to Healthy Relationships and Marriage

5 Key Steps to Healthy Relationships

Maintaining a healthy relationship does not come easy.  It takes a collaborative effect from both partners to maintain a healthy relationship.

Learn the 5 Key Steps to Healthy Relationships

  1. Accept them for who they are: As you date someone and get to know them better, you will discover things about them that you don’t admire.  It is important to remember to still treat them with respect and understand that you may not always agree on everything.  They may have their own belief systems, values and ways of unique dealing with situations; cherish their point of view and be open to see things from their perspective.
  2. Meet the basic needs of a relationship:  People choose to be in a relationship for many reasons.  Some reasons include love, affection, emotional support and friendship.  For other people, their basic needs may be more elaborate, therefore, it is imperative to really listen to your partner and learn what is essential to their needs.
  3. The ability to forgive:  People are human and do make mistakes.  In a relationship, it is important to forgive.  The ability to forgive your partner is what allows you to move forward in the relationship.   It also prevents feelings of resentment.
  4. The ability to solve problems:  Every relationship will encounter problems but it is how one handles complex situations that determines the outcome.  By making a conscious effort to solve conflict and problems in a relationship and getting past the issues is a great way to maintain a healthy relationship.  Furthermore, it can even bring you closer together.
  5. Apologize when you are in the wrong: Apologize quickly when you know you have done something wrong to upset your partner.  Taking too long to acknowledge that you did something wrong will make matters worse.  Part of having any healthy relationship is the ability to communicate honestly and effectively.

Are You in an Unhealthy Relationship or Marriage?

If you are in an unhealthy relationship or marriage, and have done your best to make it work, it may be time to explore other options.  Ask your partner if they are willing to go to couples’ counseling, relationship coaching and to learn how to make adjustments in their (and your) behavior for the sake of the relationship.  If all else fails, it may be time to move on, close the chapter on this relationship and then move on to a healthier relationship.

If you have questions about divorce or divorce mediation, contact Sabra Law Group today for a confidential consultation at (646) 472-7971.

5 Tactics On Dealing with Conflict During Divorce

Dealing With Conflict During a Divorce in New York

 

Mastering the skill of resolving conflict and effective communication is essential when it comes to maintaining a healthy relationship.  One of the main reasons people end up divorcing is that they are unable to resolve their conflicts in an effective manner. 

 

It may be common for one partner to withdraw while the other one makes countless efforts to have a meaningful conversation.  One partner resorts to the “silent treatment” and the other partner wants to talk through the problematic issues.

 

Try to Implement The 5 Tactics Below to Minimize Conflict During the Divorce Process:

 

  1.  Don’t Be Overly Critical:  It is easier to get your point across by stating more of what you would like to see; rather than blaming your spouse for what they never do. 
  2. Take Accountability for Your Actions:  If you know that you were a bit too harsh with your spouse, realize that an apology may be warranted.  By apologizing for your bad attitude, it helps change the whole response that you will get from your spouse.
  3. Don’t Take Your Anger Out On Your Spouse:  Even if your spouse is the primary reason that you are so angry, it is best to stay calm.  When dealing with a divorce, you will have to discuss many difficult topics and it will be easier to come to terms if you can both do so calmly. 
  4. Watch Your Tone and Sarcasm:  Even if you are not yelling at your spouse, it is imperative to watch your tone.  If your tone is sarcastic or condescending, it may set your spouse off. 
  5. Don’t Be Defensive: Even if you really believe that you are right and your spouse is wrong, don’t show it by being defensive.  It is important to remember that there are two versions to every story and their version may not match yours. 

 

If you are having difficulty with discussing important issues regarding child custody, child support, and division of assets with your spouse, consult a Manhattan Divorce Mediator. 

 

Contact Sabra Law Group Today for a Divorce Discovery Session

 

Sabra Sasson has years of experience helping divorcing couples work through difficult issues that arise during divorce with a favorable outcome.  Call Sabra today at (646) 472-7971.  She can help you with dealing with conflict during your divorce process.

 

 

 

How to Be Prepared and Knowledgeable for a New York Divorce

New York Divorce

 

The more knowledge you have the better prepared you will be for a New York Divorce.  When it comes to divorce, there are so many issues to sort through that it can be difficult to determine where to begin. 

 

The first step is to make a list of all the important things that have to be done.   Some of these items are all part of nearly every divorce and these things may include: developing a parenting plan, the division of assets, determine living arrangement and child custody.  There are other things that are not so obvious but just as important to handle. 

 

Things to Handle During a Divorce That You May Overlook

 

  1. Update all your passwords to your email, banking accounts, and social media accounts.  Perhaps you had shared accounts with your spouse or maybe they had the passwords for some reason, however, it is important to keep things separate during the divorce process.
  2. Remember to handle any medical issues while you still have the same insurance coverage as your rates and deductibles may change when your marital status changes to “single”.
  3. Request a copy of your credit report.  It is imperative to have an understanding of where you stand because you will now need your credit to apply for an apartment, buy a house, or even purchase a car in the future.
  4. Consider opening up a P.O. Box for mail.
  5. Make a list of any joint purchases/ventures that may need to be divided in the divorce.

 

Consult a New York Mediation Attorney for More Information

 

Before you make any major decisions about divorce, you may want to consult an experienced New York Mediation attorney who can educate you on all of your options.  What is right for one person may not be right for another, therefore, it is important to determine what route to take when it comes to your New York divorce. 

 

For some couples, litigation is the only route, for others, mediation is a more cost-effective avenue.  In order to truly determine what route is best for you, it is best to know the details and potential ramifications of each route. 

 

Call Sabra at Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 to set up a Divorce Discovery Session

5 Reasons a Marriage in New York May Fail

Reasons a Marriage May Fail

Everyone knows that marriage is hard work and it takes the participation and cooperation of both spouses to make it work.

Every marriage will have its ups and downs, however, the marriages that last are able to get past their problems and move forward.  Some issues are resolvable, while other issues are very difficult to get past. 

                  

It is Important to Recognize the 5 Most Common Reasons Why Marriages Fail: 

 

  1.  Workaholic:  One partner is a workaholic and works so much that the marriage is neglected.  The spouse that doesn’t work at all or as much starts feeling lonely and frustrated.  Even after repeated conversations about working too much, the workaholic spouse ignores how his/her spouse feels.  Furthermore, the workaholic spouse fails to make any changes to his/her schedule in order to spend more time with the family. 
  2. Infidelity:  This is one of the most common issues that can tear even a healthy marriage apart.  Some couples can get past the infidelity and work towards repairing the relationship, whereas; it causes other couples to grow apart, become resentful and lose the trust that they once had.
  3. Lack of Support: If there is a lack of support in the marriage, it can become troublesome.  If one partner is unable to support the other through a difficult time or in new ventures that they may be pursuing, it can lead to friction.  The lack of support in a marriage can also lead one to seek support and validation outside of the marriage.
  4. Financial Difficulties: Financial struggles can definitely put a strain on a marriage.  This is especially true if one person is the breadwinner and the other does not bring in any income.   The pressure of having to pay for tuition for children’s college when extra money is not coming in can result in arguments and disagreements about how to handle expenses.  In addition, it can prompt couples to have arguments over spending habits. 
  5. Different Interests/Lifestyle:  This can become problematic when couples have different interests and/or personality traits.  If one person is outgoing and loves to go out, whereas; the other person is a homebody and loves to stay at home and watch TV, it can cause couples to grow apart.  It is also possible that one spouse may become jealous of the other spouse.  

 

Is Your Marriage in New York Failing?

 

If you have tried to save your marriage, but nothing is working, it may be time to consult a New York divorce mediation lawyer.  Contact Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971 today for Discovery Session with Sabra.

 

Tips on How to Deal with Divorce When You Have Teenage Children

Deal with Divorce

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It is very important to know how to deal with your teenagers during a divorce.  This is because teenagers can be extremely emotional and sensitive when it comes to divorce.  They are going through hormonal changes and can sometimes become angry or resentful during a divorce.  They may not always communicate what is bothering them; regardless, it is important to provide an open door policy so they do feel comfortable talking to you about anything.  Furthermore, know what your teenager’s hot buttons are and try to avoid anything that sets them off during this difficult time.

 

Once you have taken the time to sit down and explain to your teenager that you are getting divorced, make sure you ask them if they have any questions for you.  As a parent, it is important to be supportive and show that you care about their opinion.  This does not mean that you need to stay in an unhappy marriage because they don’t want you to divorce.  What it means is that effective communication will help ease their pain.  Children want to know that their opinion matters and that they have a say in important family decisions. 

 

If your child’s behavior takes a negative route, it is imperative to address the issue right away.  The longer you wait to deal with bad behavior, the worse it may get. 

 

If you notice a drastic change in your child’s mood or behavior, you may consider seeking professional help.  Your teenager may be more open to talking to a 3rd party about their feelings and emotions rather than sharing them with you.

 

Furthermore, plan some fun activities with your children.  Family fun time is essential during this difficult time.  Plan some activities that your teenager would enjoy such as an outdoor festival, carnival, movie or a concert. Some fun and laughter will be good for the entire family.

 

If you are dating during your divorce, try to keep your private life private, for now.  Your teenager may not be ready to hear about your latest date or the fact that you have already moved on with your life. Moreover, dating is complicated for adults.  Your teenager is still a young adult and does not have the experience or emotional capacity that you have to deal with all of the emotions that get caught up in a relationship.  It’s easy for children to develop attachments to others, and if it doesn’t work out with you and your dating prospect, it will only become yet another issue for your children to work through.  Not only will your children be processing your divorce and how it will affect their lives and what your divorce means for them, they will now need to process the relationship they formed with your date and try to decipher and understand why they don’t come around anymore.  Moreover,

 

Learn How to Effectively Deal with Divorce When You Have Teenage Children

 

You may have unanswered questions about divorce in New York, contact Sabra Divorce Law for a discovery session on dealing with divorce.  Contact the office today at (646) 472-7971. 

How to Stay Calm During the Divorce Process in New York   

Divorce Process in New York       

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Even if you are just beginning to consider divorce, the thought of divorce is stressful enough.  You may not be sure yet if divorce is the route you want to take, however, the more informed you are, the easier your decision will be. You may not have all the answers, however, it helps to talk to a New York Divorce Mediator who does.  Contact Sabra Sasson today for a Divorce Discovery Session.

 

There are some steps you can take to keep your divorce as peaceful as possible.  Once you have decided to divorce your spouse, the first step will be to break the bad news to them in a respectful manner.  It is best to do this in private when the children are not around.  Furthermore, it will go over more smoothly if you personally break the news, instead of having your lawyer break the news.  If your spouse learns that there is already an attorney involved they may become defensive or feel betrayed and that may lead to a more contentious and more expensive divorce.  This is especially true if you have not first communicated with them about your intentions to end the marriage. 

 

The second step is to become well informed about your options regarding the divorce process in New York.  It may be best to consult a New York Divorce Mediator or Divorce Attorney who can best advise you on your options. Lawyering up and heading to court is not your only option.  The more information you have upfront, the easier it will be to make the right decision for you.  There are so many considerations when it comes to divorce: child support, child custody, division of assets, selling the marital home, and much more and it can be too complicated to resolve on your own. 

 

No matter how upset you are with your spouse, it is best to maintain your composure about the situation as best as you can. Have you heard this saying? When emotions are high, intelligence is low and when emotions are low, intelligence is high. By remaining calm and collected, you will be able to think more clearly and not let your emotions get in the way of making rational and important decisions. 

 

There may even be times when your spouse is intentionally trying to upset you.  It is important to stay calm even when you find it difficult to do so.

 

Stay Calm During the Divorce Process in New York

 

Contact Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 for more tips on how to stay calm during your divorce and to schedule your Discovery Session.    

How to Take Control of Your Divorce in New York City

When you got married, you didn’t plan on getting divorced.  However, if your marriage is heading toward divorce, there are some things you can do now to be better prepared and in control. 

Divorce can be very costly. It can take a long time and it can be financially expensive.  One way to reduce both the time and the expense is to avoid unnecessary litigation and explore other possible methods for ending your marriage. (Sabra Law Group can help you figure that out in a Discovery Session).

Whether you intend to file for divorce or if you are caught off guard by your spouse, it is important to compose yourself and control your emotions so that you can engage in the divorce process with a rational and thoughtful mind.  If you find it challenging to control your emotions, then you may want to consider talking with a therapist, psychologist or a divorce coach.  When your emotions take over, you can almost inevitably be assured that your divorce will be very costly (both in time and resources).  

You may also receive advice from well-meaning friends and family about taking possession of at least half of your marital assets.  Depending upon where you are in the divorce process, that may or may not be beneficial to your situation.  Consulting with a New York divorce attorney or a New York divorce mediator who can help you make decisions about essential next steps and how to best protect yourself would be helpful.  Furthermore, you can check out this book for more information and considerations regarding your money, your children and divorce.

Additional Resources for Your Divorce

In addition to a divorce mediator and divorce lawyer, you may need a therapist for your children or yourself if your divorce is extremely traumatic or simply to help you and your children to process this new change in your lives. Now is a good time to increase your attention to your self-care and take up an activity, such as running, yoga, meditation, or other activities to help calm your nerves as well as reduce stress levels.  Finding a local divorce support group can also be beneficial as it gives you the opportunity to connect with other people who can relate to what you are going through. 

Additionally, you may want to consult a tax advisor, a financial consultant or a certified divorce financial advisor to help you understand your finances and explore various possibilities for equitable distribution and support.  And if there is marital property, you may also need a real estate consultant or appraiser. 

Compile Useful Documents As Soon as Possible

Gather financial documents, including tax returns, bank statements, statements for any brokerage accounts, retirement accounts, credit cards, mortgages, car loans, and other bills.  Obtaining complete account numbers for all of these resources would be helpful as well.

Need Assistance Preparing for Your Divorce in New York City?

As you can see, there are a lot of moving parts and there may be a need to work with several different professionals who can assist you through the divorce process.  For more information about how to prepare for your divorce, and where to start first, contact Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 to schedule an appointment for your personal Discovery Session.

Learn Why People Stay in Unhappy Marriages

The reasons people divorce will vary from one couple to the next.  Some people decide to divorce because of infidelity or domestic abuse, whereas, for others it may simply be that they no longer get along. 

One of the main reasons people stay in unhappy marriages is because of their children.  Parents will go to any length to make sacrifices for their children.  One of these sacrifices is staying in an unhappy marriage for the sake of the children.  

The problem with doing this is that it may produce an unhealthy environment for the children.  Children learn from their surroundings and environment.  If you and your spouse are constantly arguing and fighting, then your children may be raised with the wrong perception of marriage.  Your children may fail to have a realistic outlook on what a healthy relationship and a healthy marriage really is or should entail. 

Another reason people stay in a marriage is because of the bond you once had.  Sometimes, it is hard to let go of the good times and memories.  If your mind drifts back to the time you first met and things were all rosy, it may be keeping you from thinking clearly about your future.  This false perception that because things were once good, they can be good again can be destructive.  It is better to make your decisions based on reality and not old memories that are no longer valid. 

Sometimes couples can overcome difficulties in a marriage with the assistance of various professionals – including couples therapists, marital mediation, relationship coaching and through other committed effort by the couple.

In other instances, fear keeps people in unhealthy marriages.  The fear of the unknown, the fear of being alone, the fear of being a single parent all drive people to stay together.   If you allow fear to rule your life and decision-making process, your judgment will become clouded and may prevent you from moving forward in your life. 

Evaluate Your Decision to Stay in a Marriage Based on What Makes You Happy and What is in the Best Interest of Your Children

Of course, there are certain factors that may influence your decision to stay in a marriage or not, however, make sure that you’re making decisions for the right reasons. 

If you have questions about divorce or how to best protect your children during the divorce process, contact Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971.