Divorce in Manhattan

How Divorce Affects Children in New York

As New York parents battle out their divorce; oftentimes their kids get caught in the middle. Divorce can definitely take a toll on your children but there are ways to minimize the impact that it has on them. There are many ways that divorce an impact a child; but let’s explore a few of the most common ramifications of divorce on children.

Children May Experience a Roller Coaster of Emotions

The type of emotions may also vary depending upon the age of your children. Younger children may be confused because they don't understand what is really going on and they also may be unrealistically trying to get their parents back together.

When it comes to teenagers, they may resort to acting out or even feeling guilt and anger about the divorce. It is not uncommon for some children to feel responsible for the divorce even though they have nothing to do with it.

This is why it's important for both parents to have a sit-down conversation with your children together and reassure them that they are loved and that they have nothing to do with the fact you are getting divorced. Explain to them that the divorce is not going to change how much you both love them; and while there may be changes to living arrangements or day to day routines, you will do your best to keep them comfortable.

Are They Acting Out in School or Do They Seem Less Interested in School than Before?

For some children, divorce can also take a toll on their schooling; some children may start skipping class or even acting out towards other students or their teachers. Additionally, if your children are teenagers they may even try to engage in drugs or alcohol. This is why it's so important to have conversations with them throughout the divorce process. Remember to not get so wrapped up in your divorce that you don't know where your kids are or what they're doing. Yes, the divorce will be stressful and require a lot of your time, however, the more involved you can be in your children’s life, the better the transition will be for them.

Children May Become Depressed or Withdrawn During a Divorce in New York

Watch out for signs of depression in your children during divorce. If your children seem to be sad, withdrawn or stay in their room a lot this could be a sign that they are sad or depressed. If your child is exhibiting signs of being sad depressed or angry it is a good idea to seek professional help for your child.

Notify Your Children’s School to Contact You if Your Child Seems Off

It may also be beneficial to notify your school that you're going through a divorce and that if the teachers notice any difference in your children's behavior or if your child becomes troublesome that they should notify you. You can only fix a problem if you know there is one so it's better to be proactive instead of reactive.

Considering Divorce and Looking out for the Well Being of Your Children?

If you are thinking of filing for divorce in New York or have already started the process reach out to Sabra Law Group for the legal support and guidance you need. Sabra Law Group provides both divorce mediation and divorce litigation services to NY couples with children who have decided to split. A divorce can get complicated, and even more so, if children are involved. Let the New York divorce mediation and litigation lawyers at Sabra Law Group assist you in your divorce matters, call (646) 472-7971.

How to Get Through Divorce with Emotional Grit

Besides losing a loved one, divorce is one of the most difficult and emotional times one will go through. During a divorce, it is normal to experience a multitude of feelings. One day you may be feeling angry whereas the next day you may be feeling sad and depressed. And in the midst of it all, you may even see a glimmer of hope when you're having a good day. If you can learn how to utilize emotional grit during your divorce; it can help you build the resilience that you need to get through this difficult time. Think of emotional grit as the strength, courage, and wisdom that helps you navigate the toughest things that life throws your way, including divorce. Let’s explore how to get through divorce with emotional grit and come out ahead.

Don't Deny Your Feelings

If you're feeling sad, angry, hurt, or betrayed, understand that these are real emotions and you're not the only one who is going through these emotions. Other people in New York who have gone through divorce have also experienced these same feelings. What's more important is that you acknowledge your emotions and accept that this is a normal process of going through a divorce.

Build a Strong Support System to Lean on When Needed

Having a strong network of friends and family will ensure that when you do have a rough day dealing with your soon-to-be ex, you will have the support that you need to get through the toughest days. If you don't have a strong circle of friends and family that you can go to or maybe you're more of a private person, consider getting professional help. A licensed therapist, counselor, or divorce coach can help you feel supported during this difficult time. Also, if you have not already reached out to a New York divorce lawyer or mediator you may also consider seeking legal support from them.

Set Boundaries and Stick to Them

Many times, people think that setting boundaries means telling people what you don't want or what you will not tolerate and while that is true there's another scenario to consider as well. The other scenario is that simply stating your boundaries to your soon to be ex-spouse may not be enough. Boundaries are more impactful when you actually show the other person what you're willing to tolerate and not tolerate. So, in order to enforce boundaries, you must show them that you are serious about your limits and not just tell them.

Self-Care is a Must During This Time

Make sure that you are taking time to yourself every day and that you're also eating right, exercising, getting enough sleep, and doing things that make you happy.

Even if you have children to take care of and a full-time job it's imperative that you take some time to yourself every day. Even if it's taking half an hour to go for a walk or listen to your favorite audiobook, going for a jog or to the gym or a lecture or play.

Think of Divorce as a Learning Experience

Every negative thing that happens to you in life can be used as a learning experience to grow as a person. Using your struggles as a learning experience can definitely help you be more resilient and prepared to bounce back from anything that life sends your way.

Be Open to Change

If there's one thing that every divorce has in common is that nothing stays the same and change is inevitable in a divorce. Therefore, instead of fighting the change, embrace it with open arms as a positive thing in your life rather than a negative. This may be easier said than done.

Don't Be Too Hard on Yourself

Just remember that you are human, and you can only do your best, and whatever happens after that is out of your control. Therefore, if you know that you've done your best then give yourself some grace.

Do You Need Legal Guidance During Your Divorce in New York?

Call Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971 to get the help that you need and take some of the pressure off by letting a New York divorce mediator communicate and negotiate the complex terms of your divorce.

What Are the Steps for Filing for Divorce in New York?

Divorce can be an unexpected life event. No one plans to get divorced and many times, one spouse may even be caught off guard by their spouse telling them that they want a divorce. Nor can one even imagine everything that goes into getting a divorce. One of the most common questions that come up when considering divorce is, “What are the steps for filing for divorce in New York?” Below are some questions to consider and tips on how to prepare when filing for divorce in the Empire State.

Do You Meet New York’s Residency Requirements?

The state of New York has certain residency requirements that you must meet to file for divorce. You have to meet one of the below NY residency requirements:

Have you or your spouse been living in New York for 2 consecutive years or more?
Did you or your spouse live in New York for at least 1 year prior to filing for divorce, and were you married in New York, or lived in New York as a married couple, or the grounds for divorce occurred in NY?
Were both you and your spouse New York residents when the divorce was filed and the grounds for your divorce happened in NY?

What Were the Grounds for Divorce?

There are two types of divorces in New York. One is called a “no-fault” divorce and it involves an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage for 6 months or more. This means that the marriage is not repairable and one spouse wishes to end it.

The second type of divorce in New York is called a “fault” divorce. A fault divorce can be based on factors in the marriage such as infidelity, abandonment, physical and emotional abuse, or if one spouse was in jail or prison for three or more years.

If you have questions about what type of divorce would be appropriate based on your unique circumstances, contact Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971.

Do You Have All of Your Financial Documents Ready?

An important part of filing for divorce is making sure that you have gathered all of your financial documents. Financial documents may include items such as tax returns, bank statements, 401K, and other retirement accounts, pay stubs, investment accounts, credit card statements, loan accounts, and any debts.

Financial documents are essential for determining how assets will be divided as well as spousal support and child support payments. Your New York divorce attorney will also need these documents to help you with your divorce process.

Have You Considered What You May Want to Include in a Parenting Plan?

Have you discussed with your spouse to discuss matters such as custody arrangements, and how you plan on co-parenting? Remember that the courts in New York will always put the best interest of the children above anything else, so it helps to find some common ground with your spouse.

Have You Filed a Summons with Notice or a Summons and Complaint With the County Clerk’s Office?

The summons should include what the grounds for divorce are, how many children you have together, proof of New York residency, and your preferences about custody and division of assets. You may also include additional information on any other divorce issues that are important to document.

Have You Served Your Spouse?

Once you have filed the summons, you have to serve your spouse with the divorce papers within 120 days or less. Usually, a third party is utilized to personally serve your spouse with the divorce papers.

Did Your Spouse Respond to Your Divorce Papers?

Once your spouse has responded to your divorce papers, you will have to start the negotiation process and come to an agreement on divorce matters such as custody and division of assets. If you wish to agree without having to hash it out in court, you may want to consider divorce mediation. Divorce mediation is a more cost-effective and less adversarial option for divorcing as it calls for open communication and compromise to come to resolutions on the various aspects of divorce such as custody, division of assets, and co-parenting.

Need Help for Filing for Divorce in New York?

Contact Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 if you need assistance with filing for divorce in New York and help with negotiating the terms of your divorce.

10 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Considering Divorce in New York

Contemplating divorce should never be taken lightly. Deciding to divorce should be well-thought out and it is important to have the right conversations. By conversations, this means conversations with yourself and your spouse. Below are 10 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Considering Divorce in New York.

Have You Communicated Your Feelings to Your Spouse?

The first question you should ask yourself is have you taken the time to open and honestly communicate with your spouse about your unhappiness in the marriage? Have you told them that you are unhappy and considering divorce? By openly communicating with your spouse, it allows them to potentially fix what may be broken in the marriage. One of the reasons marriages fail in New York is also because of lack of communication.

Have You Tried Marriage Counseling?

Many New York couples have been able to salvage their marriage because of marriage counseling. If you and your spouse have not entirely given up on your marriage, it may make sense to try seeking the assistance of a therapist or marriage counselor.

Do You Have a Clear Understanding of Why You Want a Divorce?

You should have a clear understanding of the reasons why you are considering divorce. If you are unable to come to a clear understanding, then you may need to do a bit more soul-searching before making such a huge decision.

Are You Financially Prepared for Divorce?

Divorce can be expensive in New York; especially if it is more complex and requires litigation. Divorce mediation is a more cost-effective option if you and your spouse are on speaking terms and willing to make decisions without having to go to court. You must also consider the living arrangements and expenses after divorce.

Are You Willing to Disrupt Your Children’s Lifestyle?

Getting a divorce may mean that your children may have to change schools or give up their friends or after-school activities that they enjoy. You will have to assess how the divorce may impact your children and weigh your options of what is right for you and your family.

Are You Emotionally Prepared for Divorce?

Divorce can be emotionally taxing. Do you have a support system to rely on if needed? Divorce is one of the most stressful life events you will have to go through in your life.

Are You Making a Spontaneous Decision to Divorce Because You Are Angry?

Ask yourself if you are claiming to divorce because you are angry at something that happened recently or are the problems in your marriage are more of a boiling pot that just tipped over?

Will You Have Regrets About Ending Your Marriage?

Be prepared to ask yourself if you will have regrets afterwards. Because if you are really ending your marriage to do what is best for you; you should not have any regrets.

Are You Prepared to Make Such a Drastic Change In Your Life Right Now?

And maybe divorce is the answer, but you must also ask yourself about “timing.” Is it the right time for you to divorce now or would you be in a better place 6-12 months from now? A divorce is something that requires planning and careful consideration of the next steps. There are so many factors to consider such as who will live where?

Are You Able to Handle Being a Single Parent?

What plan do you have to take care of your children? What about having to go back to the workforce to make a living; would you be comfortable putting your children in daycare or with a babysitter? Being a single parent means being able to juggle everything on your own and also be able to financially support yourself and your children.

Divorcing? Need Help Sorting Through Child Support and Divorce Matters in New York?

Are you considering divorce in New York? Call Sabra Law Group to discuss your options in case you do decide that you want to get divorced. Reach out to us at (646) 472-7971.

How to Date After a Divorce in New York

After years of being married, venturing out into the dating scene can be scary, especially in a big city like New York. This does not mean that you should not get back out there, but more so, have a game plan on dating in New York. Learn how to date after a divorce in New York.

Build Up Your Confidence Level

Coming out of a bad marriage can take a toll on your mental health and confidence level. So, step one before you do anything else is to work on your confidence level. There are many different ways you can build up your confidence level. One way is to practice affirmations. Look in the mirror every morning and say some positive affirmations about what you or others love about you. Another way to build your confidence is to learn a new skill or activity; whether you have been wanting to take salsa lessons or a cooking class, get out there and explore new activities. Try a new hairstyle or hair color and treat yourself to a nice dinner or a favorite excursion.

Get Out and Socialize

One of the great things about living in a big city like New York is that there is never a lack of things to do or events to go to. Consider some social or charity events, or even volunteering for your favorite charity. You can also look into Meetup groups on Meetup.com or start your own group. You may also be able to find groups on there for recently divorced people. Eventbrite also lists local events in your area.

Be Sensitive to Your Children’s Feelings

Depending on the age range of your children, you may need to have a conversation with them about your intention to start dating. You may also consider not introducing them to anyone that you are not serious with because kids are very sensitive to meeting strangers after a divorce.

Don’t Expect to Get it All Right

If dating seems awkward at first, give yourself some grace that you have been out of the dating scene for so many years. Also, don’t have any expectations in the beginning. Get out there and enjoy meeting new people and making new friends. Also, if you feel like you are not ready to date…there is no reason to rush it or “date” just because you think you should be. There is no right or wrong time to start dating and everyone has to do what is best for them.

Currently Separated or Going Through a Divorce?

If you need legal assistance with your divorce, contact Sabra Law Group today to schedule a confidential consultation at (646) 472-7971.

How to Protect Your Credit Score During a Divorce in New York

Divorce can be challenging enough with all the matters that have to be dealt with, but you also must consider the ramifications of divorce on your credit score. A New York divorce is stressful enough, but you also must come up with a game plan to tackle the division of debts and joint credit cards and credit obligations. It is important to remember that as you are separating lives; having a healthy credit score will be necessary to start over on your own.

Joint Accounts Can Have an Impact on Your Credit Score

It's not the actual marital status (getting divorced) that impacts your credit score but rather it's the joint accounts that you may have with your soon-to-be ex-spouse. As couples are going through the divorce process it's easy to overlook a monthly payment.

Late payments can have a negative impact on your credit score, and you might be dinged by a couple of points. A couple of points may not sound like a lot; however, it can be the difference between having good credit or fair credit.

Understand the Impact of Closing Joint Credit Cards

Another factor to consider is closing joint credit cards. When you close a credit card it can impact your credit utilization ratio. What this means is that your total amount of available credit decreases when you close a particular account.

Another factor to consider is that your ex-spouse may remove you as an authorized user from their credit card. The negative impact this can have is that your credit usage may be impacted and your credit score may drop as a result of not being able to use your spouse's credit card.

Some Important Considerations to Protect Yourself During a Divorce

Be Proactive and Consider Freezing Your Credit Report

Freeze your credit reports during a divorce just in case your ex-spouse wants to open accounts in your name or is attempting to open up additional joint accounts prior to the divorce.

Have Those Essential Conversations About Existing Debt with Your Spouse

If you can work with your spouse to divide up any existing accounts that you have together, it would be worth it to sit down and have a conversation about how you are going to divide those accounts up and when the best time is to handle that.

It's also important to discuss who's going to pay for the remaining debts on credit cards or how the payments will be split up.

If you cannot come to a resolution on sorting out who will pay for which debts seek the assistance of a New York divorce mediation lawyer who can help you come to an amicable resolution. Call Sabra Law Group to schedule a call at (646) 472-7971.

Invest in Monthly Credit Monitoring

It's also a good idea to sign up for a monthly credit monitoring plan so you can monitor your credit report that's why you will get notified if your credit score increases or decreases you will also be able to monitor any inaccuracies and report them so that they do not negatively impact your overall credit score.

Need Assistance in Sorting Through Important Divorce Matters in New York?

Contact Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971 to speak to a New York divorce mediation lawyer. Our firm can help you sort through the challenging issues of divorce so you can focus on what matters the most.

Should You Post on Social Media During a Divorce in New York?

If you're going through a divorce or planning to file for a divorce in New York you're probably wondering if it's a good idea to post on social media or not? There are both pros and cons of posting on social media during a divorce; however, if you can proceed with caution, you may be able to manage your social media account strategically during this time.

Whatever You Post on Social Media is Public and May Come Back to Haunt You Later

One of the most important things to keep in mind about posting on social media during divorce is that whatever you post is public information and it may be used against you in court. If you do decide to post on social media, make sure that you are not making any negative comments about your soon-to-be ex-husband. Also, refrain from sharing anything related to your kids or parenting.

Be Prepared for Unwanted Advice and Judgment if You Do Share Your Divorce Publicly On Social Media

In case you decide to make your divorce public on social media; be prepared that people may also make their own judgments and give unwanted advice in the comment section. If your goal is only to put it out there to announce it so that you don't have to reach out to everyone individually then deactivate the comments section.

Ask Yourself if Sharing Your Divorce Publicly on Social Media Will Help You Heal or Prevent You from Healing

Remember that the more you talk about divorce publicly it can also prevent you from healing during the divorce process. However, for some people, it can be therapeutic to get it out of their system. There are no set rules when it comes to this; so ultimately you have to do what you are comfortable with and what aligns with your personal values.

Be Careful Not to Share Any Personal Details of Your Divorce Online

Whenever you want to post on social media make sure that you think before you post; just as the saying goes “Think before you speak.” Another important aspect to remember is to keep personal matters personal and not share any personal information online. You can also check your social media platform privacy settings to make sure that you are only sharing your posts with the audience that you choose to; for example, Instagram has a feature where you can share your content with close friends in the stories section.

Would You Want to Rely on Your Friends and Family for Support?

You may also find it comforting to seek the support of your family and friends in real life versus friends or acquaintances on social media.

Always Put the Best Interest of Your Children First

If your children are old enough to be on social media, you may want to consider their feelings when it comes to making the divorce “public on social media.” Divorce can be especially challenging for children, so it is imperative to consider their feelings and show them that they matter.

Getting Divorced in New York City?

Contact Sabra Law Group for a divorce consultation at (646) 472-7971. Whether you are planning on mediating or litigating your divorce, Sabra Law Group has years of experience handling simple to complex divorce matters.

How to Prepare Your Children for Your Divorce in New York City

Are you wondering how to prepare your children for divorce in New York City? Not only is it important to prepare yourself for divorce emotionally, but it is also important to mentally prepare your children. Your children’s emotional well-being is so important. Even though divorce is a difficult time to go through, you can come up with a plan to help your children get through it.

Below Are Some Tips for Preparing Your Children for Your Divorce

Be Upfront with Your Children: If your kids are old enough to understand what divorce means, have open communication with them. Just make sure that you do not go into the “blame game” of blaming your spouse and you don’t have to get into specifics or any details or reasons for the breakup. Your goal should be to inform them of the upcoming changes to the family in a compassionate and thoughtful manner. If you are unsure of how to broach the subject, speaking with a therapist or divorce coach who can help you find the right words and phrases to use for your child that is age-appropriate.

Come Up with a Consistent Message with Your Spouse About Your Divorce: Sit down with your spouse and come up with a gameplan on how to address your divorce with your children. Having a consistent message about divorce will help your children feel more secure during this process.

Give Your Children the Ability to Be Involved in Decisions That May Directly Impact Them:

Even though you and your spouse will have the final say when it comes to living arrangements and visitation schedules, try to involve your children by getting their feedback. Ask them what their preferences are and gauge certain things that may be upsetting to them and prioritize their desires when possible.

Keep Normalcy in Your Children’s Schedules When Possible: It is helpful to keep as much of their schedule the same; especially when it comes to school and extra-curricular activities. Children need a sense of stability amidst a time when so many changes are happening so quickly.

Allow Them to Go Through Emotions: Divorce is not just an emotional time for the parents but also for the children involved. Let your children feel comfortable communicating their feelings to you. If they are sad, angry, or distressed, make them feel comfortable to come to you. Remember to be compassionate and patient with them. Showing your support will help them get through this difficult time.

Need Help Preparing for Divorce in New York City?

Call Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 to speak to a New York divorce lawyer who can provide guidance on preparing for divorce.

How to Negotiate the Terms of Your Divorce with Your Spouse in New York

Divorce in New York can be a complicated process; especially when division of assets, child support, spousal support, and child custody are involved. To effectively negotiate the terms of your divorce with your spouse in New York you must be prepared and have a game plan on how to tackle each aspect of divorce.

Below are 5 Tips on How you Can be Prepared to Negotiate Your Divorce

Tip #1 Be Fully Prepared

Be fully prepared: make sure that you set aside time to find all the appropriate documentation that you will need for your divorce. This includes personal and business finances, assets, and any real estate that you own together. Gather all bank statements, tax returns, real estate deeds, and any retirement, 401K, IRA and pension account statements, any investment statements such as stocks, bonds, and mutual funds as well as any other financial asset documents.

Tip #2 Get the Help of a New York Divorce Mediator

Consult an experienced New York divorce mediator: A New York divorce mediator is familiar with resolving all aspects of your divorce and she can help advise you and facilitate this process.

Tip #3 Know Your Deal Breakers But be Willing to Compromise

Know what your deal breakers are: It is imperative to identify what is most important to you. No one party in a divorce will get everything that they want; so be willing to compromise. Be willing to give up certain things to gain other things that are more important to you.

If you're unclear about what you want out of the divorce, consider consulting a New York divorce mediator who can advise you concerning getting the best outcome for your divorce.

Tip #4 Communicate Openly with Your Spouse

Have open communication with your spouse: If your spouse is willing to listen make sure that you can set aside time to have a heart-to-heart conversation about what is important to you and get an understanding of what matters most to them.

It is sensible to also be empathetic in your communication and not just demand what you want out of the divorce but also be understanding of what your spouse's needs are.

Tip #5 Consider Mediation or a Collaborative Divorce in New York

Divorce mediation may help you come to an agreement if you're not getting anywhere with your spouse on your own: you may want to consider retaining the services of a New York divorce mediator who can help you reach a settlement that is fair to both of you.

Realize that a collaborative divorce is also an option: In a collaborative divorce, which is similar to mediation, except that in addition to a mediator, each party also retains a collaborative divorce attorney as well as a neutral financial expert and mental health expert, all of these professionals work together, in collaboration, to help you and your spouse come to an amicable agreement. The advantage of a collaborative divorce is that it can help reduce conflict between both parties and it may help you come to a more feasible and amicable solution faster than in you went to court in a litigated divorce.

Need Help Negotiating the Terms of Your Divorce with Your Spouse in New York City?

Contact Sabra Law Group, a divorce mediation firm in New York that can help you get through the complexities of divorcing in New York. Call Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971.

The Importance of Self-Care During a Divorce in Manhattan NY

Going through a high-conflict divorce can take a toll on your mental and physical health. Going through a divorce can be an emotionally draining process. Which is why it's so important to make time for yourself and self-care. There are so many moving parts to think of when divorcing and obviously your children will always come first, but in order to take care of your children you must also prioritize your well-being. Prioritizing your well-being will position you to handle everything that comes your way.

Three Ways to Ensure That You Are Prioritizing Yourself During a Divorce in Manhattan

Every day make time to do something that brings you joy and happiness. Even if your time is limited make sure you allocate 15 to 30 minutes a day to do something that makes you happy. It can be as simple as taking a walk outside or even meditating or taking a yoga class. Even a quick trip to your favorite coffee shop for that latte can be a mood booster. Another mood booster can be getting all dressed up even if you're not leaving the house; dressing up may help you elevate your confidence level so you can feel ready to tackle this divorce and anything that comes with it.

Seek Support from Others Who Can Help You

Ask for support from friends, family, and other professionals. Going through a divorce in New York is never easy; so, the more friends and family you have to support you, the easier it will be on you mentally. Even if you're not looking to seek any advice from other people sometimes it helps just to have someone to talk to and a good listening ear. If you are feeling mentally drained, you can also seek the professional help of a therapist to help you sort through difficult issues. Also, utilize your New York divorce lawyer to help you deal with your difficult spouse. Your divorce attorney can tackle difficult divorce issues so you can minimize contact with your soon-to-be ex-spouse.

Practice Healthy Habits Everyday

Make sure that you are implementing healthy habits every single day. Healthy habits means eating food that's going to energize you instead of bringing you down. And it means exercising and getting outdoors to get some vitamin D and fresh air. Going for a long jog or a long walk can do wonders for relieving some of the stress sets weighing on you from the divorce.

Remember that to take care of your kids and everything that's going to come your way with the divorce you must take care of yourself first and foremost. When you take care of yourself you will have the energy, grit, and mindset to tackle the difficult aspects of a divorce.

Seek the Support of a New York Divorce Attorney

Get the guidance and support you need from a knowledgeable and experienced divorce lawyer and mediator. Call Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971.

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