New York Divorce Mediator

5 Valid Fears That Keep People in a Bad Marriage

Getting Out of a Bad MarriageThere are so many reasons that people stay in a bad marriage, but the number one reason is fear.  There is a huge fear of the unknown amongst other things.  Let’s explore 10 valid fears that keep people in a bad marriage.

 

Not Being Able to Survive Financially on Your Own

 

Let’s face it, the financial aspect of divorce is a huge factor that induces fear.  Let’s suppose that your spouse is the sole income provider and you have spent the majority of the marriage taking care of the children.  Now…being faced with having to go back into the workforce after years of not working can be a scary thought.

 

Being Worried About How Divorce May Impact the Children

 

One of the main reasons people delay divorce is because of the welfare of their children.  Some parents even stay in a bad marriage until the children are of legal age in order to protect their children from the ramifications of divorce. 

 

Being Alone or Lonely

 

Especially if one has been married for many years, the thought of having to be single or start over can be scary.  It makes it harder if one has been dependent on their spouse for everything.  After being accustomed to having your spouse around and relying on them for friendship, emotional and financial support, going at it alone may instill a bit of anxiety. 

 

Feeling Like You Will Never Meet Someone and Being Alone

 

The thought of getting back out there in the dating realm can be difficult for some people to comprehend.  Couple that with a lack of confidence and it becomes a fear that may keep someone in a bad marriage longer than they need to be.  Confidence can be built up over time and by doing things that help you feel and look your best.  Working out, eating right, dressing up even just to go to the grocery store can boost your mood and confidence.

 

The Guilt of Hurting Your Spouse

 

Guilt is another factor that may impact staying in a bad marriage or not.  One may feel guilty for wanting to leave their spouse; especially if their spouse is emotionally fragile. Divorce is painful by nature and most people do not want to intentionally hurt their spouse.

 

Are You Scared of Leaving a Bad Marriage?

 

If you are scared of leaving a bad marriage, you are not alone.  So many New York married couples struggle with the difficult decision of staying in a bad marriage or divorcing.  Just know that you are not alone and so many clients that come to us are all conflicted with making this difficult decision.  Sometimes, it helps to explore your options so that if you do want out of your marriage, you have an idea of what to expect ahead of time instead of frantically trying to get your questions answered when things do come to an end.

 

Don’t Let Your Fear Get in the Way of Exploring Your Options

 

If you have questions about divorce or custody in New York City or need help getting out of a bad marriage, call Sabra Law Group to schedule a confidential consultation at (646) 472-7971.

 

 

 

 

 

How to Protect Your Assets During a Divorce in NYC

How to Protect Your Assets During a Divorce in NYC

 

Divorce in New York can be stressful enough but when you couple that with splitting up assets it can be a lot to tackle. Not only do you have to be concerned about splitting up assets, but you also have to be concerned with how to protect your assets in a divorce. A New York divorce mediator shares how to protect your assets during a divorce in New York City.

How to Protect Your Assets During a Divorce in NYC

Understand the Difference Between marital Property and Separate Property

 

Marital property pertains to any assets or debts that were acquired during the marriage. Marital property is able to be divided up in a divorce.

 

Separate property pertains to property that was owned prior to the marriage. It can also pertain to property that may have been received as a gift or inheritance. Separate property for the most part is not usually divided in a divorce.

 

One of the Best Ways to Protect Your Assets During a Divorce is Through a Prenup or a Postnuptial Agreement

 

A prenuptial or postnuptial agreement outlines how the assets and debts will be handled in the event of a divorce.

 

Consider Having Separate Accounts for Any Premarital Assets or Any Inheritance Funds

 

This is important to keep them from being commingled with marital assets so that it is easier to distinguish the origin of these assets.

 

Keep Track of Accurate Reporting and Records of any Assets that Were Required

 

Keep records of what the dates were and where the funds came to pay for these assets. Furthermore, make sure that you or keeping any inheritance documentation handy when needed.

 

If you're not sure about the value of particular assets such as paintings or real estate or even a family business; go to an appraiser to get an appraisal for your assets. Getting an appraisal will help your assets from being undervalued during the divorce process.

 

Keep an eye on any joint bank accounts that you have to make sure that there are not any unauthorized transactions or withdrawals. You should also keep an eye on your credit card accounts to make sure that there are not any unauthorized or large purchases that you're not aware of.

 

What to Do If You Suspect Your Spouse May Be Hiding Assets in New York?

 

Do your homework if you are suspicious that your spouse may be hiding assets. You might consider utilizing these systems of a forensic accountant who may be able to uncover any discrepancies.

 

Have Questions About Protecting Your Assets During a Divorce?

 

Call Sabra Law Group to speak to a knowledgeable New York divorce lawyer who can guide you on how to prepare for divorce and protect your assets in New York City. Call Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971. 

 

 

How You Can Have a Low-Conflict Divorce in New York City

Low Conflict Divorce in New YorkIt is possible to have a low-conflict divorce in New York City if you are prepared.   While being prepared can help you have a low-conflict divorce; it is important to remember that not everyone's soon-to-be ex is going to be cooperative. If you happen to have a spouse that is manipulative or narcissistic it may take a bit more work to have a low-stress divorce. A New York divorce mediation lawyer shares some tactics for having a low-conflict divorce in NYC below.

 

Get as Many Issues as Possible off the Table Before Seeking Outside Assistance

 

Before you retain the services of a divorce mediation lawyer or a New York divorce lawyer try to get a gauge for where things stand with your soon-to-be ex. Have an open and honest conversation with them to see which issues you may be able to resolve before getting outside assistance. It may be sensible to discuss things like do they want the divorce to be over as soon as possible. Or are they willing to fight it out in court because they're not willing to settle on some of the bigger things?  And even if you cannot resolve any issues, a professional will help you work through them and resolve them.

 

Focus on What's Really Important When it Comes to Divorce

 

Rather than focusing on material things, focus on the best interest of the children first and then proceed to other matters that must be resolved. Remember to not let other divorce matters take precedence over your children.

 

Refrain from Blaming Each Other and Pointing Fingers

 

Pointing out the negative aspects of your spouse is not going to help matters! Let's suppose that your spouse did cheat on you, but if you keep pointing that out to them over and over it's not going to help resolve the matters at hand. Keep your conversations focused on agreeing on key matters in the divorce. 

 

Divorce is complex and many issues have to be sorted through including child custody, child support, division of assets, and much more. By keeping your emotions out of the equation you're more likely to come to a quicker resolution that makes sense for both parties. Again, the right professional can help you stay focused on the issues at hand rather than letting your emotions interfere with reaching resolutions and making agreements.

 

Acknowledge That You Will Have to Compromise

 

By not compromising, the divorce process will only get delayed and your goal of having a low-conflict divorce will not be met. Remember that a high-conflict divorce is not only stressful but can take a toll on your mental health and the health of your children.  By not compromising, it can also end up costing you thousands of dollars more to divorce.

 

Seek the Right Support System for Your Needs

 

When you first announce to your network of friends and family that you're getting divorced; a lot of them may try to give you unwanted advice or interfere in your marriage problems. It's important to realize that not all of your friends are going to have your best interest at heart, and you have to determine who is truly there to be by your side and who is there to be judgmental. When it comes to finding the right support system, keep your circle small so that it keeps the private matters at hand more private. If you cherish your privacy, then you want to make sure that you only share private matters with friends and family who have proven to be discreet.

 

Most of All Don't Forget to Take Care of Yourself

 

Everyone knows that going through a divorce can be a taxing experience, therefore; it is important to take care of yourself. This means taking time for yourself to de-stress, unwind, take a walk, go to the gym, meditate, do yoga or do anything that you find relaxing.

 

Having to take care of the kids and possibly even having a full-time job while going through a divorce is not an easy task! However, if you remember to take some time for yourself every day, it can help set you up to be able to tackle whatever comes your way.

 

Consider Divorce Mediation in New York City if You Are Wanting a Low Conflict Divorce

 

Call Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 at to schedule a confidential consultation. Whether you want to mediate your divorce or have more complex matters that require litigation, our New York divorce mediation firm is here to assist.

 

 

 

5 Reasons Why People Fear Getting Divorced in New York City

Getting divorced in New YorkDivorce, by nature, is a scary experience to go through; however, there are some very valid reasons why some people fear getting divorced in New York City. And it's not that they fear getting divorced in New York; it's the divorce that they fear.

 

The Unknown Can be Quite Frightening

 

Not knowing where you're going to live, not knowing how you're going to financially support yourself, not knowing if you'll be able to take care of your children in the same way that they were accustomed to before the divorce can be frightening.

 

Not Being Financially Prepared for Divorce or Financially Independent

 

Another reason that some people are scared to get divorced in New York is that they may not be financially prepared for divorce. This could mean that their spouse was the breadwinner while they stayed home and took care of the kids. Therefore, they do not have a source of income coming in. So, now having to rely on child support alone can induce fear in even the most confident person. Not being financially prepared for divorce can instill some fears around the ability to take care of themselves and their children.

 

Keep in mind that even though divorce is scary is not to suggest staying in a bad marriage just because of financial reasons.  There are many ways to get the support that you need. Don't be afraid to ask friends and family to help you take care of the children while you go to job interviews, or are working on starting a new business.

 

The Fear of Not Finding Someone to Replace Your Spouse

 

This can also be known as the fear of ending up alone.  Even if you're going to be alone for a while after divorce that does not mean you're going to be single and alone forever. In fact, it is important to take time to heal from a divorce before jumping into a serious relationship too quickly. Remember to be confident in who you are and what you stand for and don't deviate from your values just because you're feeling undervalued.

 

Do You Fear Being Judged by Your Friends and Family?

 

In certain cultures, divorce is frowned upon, and family members may not approve of your divorce. However, it is imperative to keep in mind that it is your life, not theirs and you have to do what is best for your mental health and for your children. As far as your friends go it is not their place to judge your life because they cannot truly understand the dynamics of your marriage.

 

Fear of How Divorce Will Impact Your Children

 

How divorce will impact your children is definitely a valid concern. Even though divorce may impact your children in the short run, ultimately, you have to do what is best for their future. If you strongly believe that you can provide a healthier environment for them, then that is all that matters.

 

Considering Getting Divorce in New York?

 

Call Sabra Law Group today to speak to a New York divorce attorney and mediator who can assist you.  Call today at 646-472-7971.

 

 

 

 

How to Determine if Your Marriage is Over in New York

Are you contemplating divorce but not sure how to tell if your marriage is over? If your marriage is coming to an end, it is easy to be in denial about it, however; there are telltale signs to be on the lookout for. 

 

6 Telltale Signs That Your Marriage May Be Headed Towards Divorce in New York

How to Tell Your Marriage is Over in New York

 

 

Telltale Sign Number 1: You fight and argue all the time and can’t seem to agree on anything.  If you are noticing that your arguments and fights are intensifying, it could be a sign that your marriage is on the rocks.

 

Telltale Sign Number 2: You no longer have the same goals and values you did as a couple together.  If you are drifting apart, you may notice that you no longer like to do the same things you once did together and are drifting apart into your own interests.

 

Telltale Sign Number 3: If you sense or discover that your spouse is cheating on you.  Infidelity is a sign that your marriage is heading towards divorce.  Even if your spouse is not physically cheating on you, they may be emotionally cheating on you.  Emotional cheating is just as hard to take in as physical cheating for more couples.

 

Telltale Sign 4: If you are married but yet feel alone and lonely all the time, it may be a sign that your marriage is on the rocks.  If your spouse is distancing themselves from you or vice versa, it is a sign that you no longer feel connected.

 

Telltale Sign 5: If you find yourself seeking validation from others constantly, it could be a sign that something is missing in your marriage.  If you are always looking for validation outside of your marriage, then you may be feeling disconnected from your spouse. 

 

Telltale Sign 6: Your spouse is being disrespectful or mentally abusive to you.  If your spouse is consistently disrespecting you or mentally or physically abusive to you, it may be time to realize that you are not in a healthy marriage.

 

Considering Divorce in New York City?

 

Even if you are not positive that you want to get divorced, it is best to know what your options are so you can be prepared if it comes to that.  If you have questions about divorcing in New York, call Sabra Law Group at (646) 472-7971 to speak to one of our experienced divorce mediation lawyers.

 

 

 

 

A New York Mediator Shares What to Do if You Are Wavering About Divorce

New York Mediator

Ending a marriage is never easy and even concluding ending a marriage can cause a lot of confusion and mixed emotions. If you are contemplating divorce in New York, there are ways that you can get more clarity on if you should divorce or not. Below are some tips that can help you gain more certainty in your divorce.

 

Make a List of Why You Want to Get Divorced

 

Evaluate what your reasons are for wanting to get divorced to begin with. By making a list of why you're wanting to end your marriage it may help you to see it on paper.  You can also weigh the pros and cons of staying in the marriage versus leaving the marriage. If the cons of staying in marriage outweigh the pros, then that might be something to reflect upon.

 

Have Open and Empathic Conversations with Your Spouse

 

If you are considering divorce, open communication with your spouse is going to be instrumental in coming to the right decision. And a marriage involves two people so it's not only what you think but you also have to take your spouse’s feelings and perspective into play.

 

If your spouse has opposing views than yours; still, try to listen and show empathy for their feelings.

 

Get Help from a Marriage Counselor or Couples Counseling

 

Try couples counseling or marriage counseling. A marriage counselor can help you identify some of the issues in your marriage and help you determine if those issues are resolvable or not.

 

How Will Divorce Impact Your Children’s Day-to-Day Life

 

You may want to consider how the divorce will impact your children. If you are going to divorce you also need to be cognizant of how the decisions, you make today will impact your children for the future. Try to consider things like is it best for your children to remain at the same school or would going to a new school be a good thing for them.  Depending on what the living and custody arrangements are for your children, you should be aware of the impact that will have on your children’s day to day life. 

 

While you should consider putting your children’s interest first when it comes to important matters in your divorce; is it also important to take your needs into consideration.

 

Are You Prepared to Deal with the Financial Implications of Divorce?

 

It is also imperative to consider the financial implications of divorce. Depending on what your financial situation looks like you might want to consider divorce mediation versus going to court and litigating your divorce. The longer a divorce takes to settle in court the more out of pocket you will have to pay for costs associated with getting divorced. If you're unsure about which option is right for you consult a New York divorce attorney and mediator who can advise you.

 

Other financial implications will include if you can financially sustain having two separate households and who will be paying for what.

 

Still Unsure About Divorce? Speak to a New York Divorce Attorney to Learn What Your Options Are!

 

Contact Sabra Law Group today at (646) 472-7971 to speak to an experienced divorce attorney and mediator who can advise you about all of the options available to you.