You Have Decided to File for Divorce in New York But Now You Have to Tell the Children

You decided to put the divorce on hold for after the holidays and now that the New Year is here, you want to officially start the divorce process.  One of the most difficult things that you will have to handle when it comes to divorce is how to tell the children about your divorce.


You will have to deal with breaking the news of divorce to the children sooner or later, so you and your spouse might as well start figuring out a plan now.  It is best to tell the children together with your spouse.


Start with Telling the Oldest Children First


If you have children that are pre-teens or teens, then it is best to tell them sooner than later.  This is because if you don’t tell them and they end up overhearing a conversation or end up finding some documents pertaining to the divorce, they will be upset that you kept it from them.


Even if they don’t overhear you or find some documents, teenagers can sense when something is off between their parents.


If you also have younger children, make sure you tell your teenage children to not say anything to them until you feel the time is right to break the news to them.  However, don’t wait too long because it is not fair to your teenage children to have the burden of hiding the divorce news from their siblings.


If Your Children Are Closer in Age, You May Consider Breaking the News to Them Together


Ideally, this is the best way to break the news to your children, but you will have to assess what is best for your family situation.  Breaking the news to your children all together will help them feel like you are treating all of them the same and not playing favoritism. 


Telling Your Children One at a Time


If your children are varied in age and maturity level or have any disabilities, it may be best to take the one-to-one approach.  By telling each child individually, it allows you to address their questions and concerns and it also allows you to tend to their emotional needs.


This is also helpful if you know that one child is way more emotional than the other.  There is no point to disrupt the other child who may be calm and then they may end up being overly emotional because of their sibling.


Have You Decided to File for Divorce in New York?


Contact Sabra Law Group today to schedule a confidential consultation at (646) 472-7971 and start the divorce process.









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