Advice from a New York Divorce Attorney: Handling Difficult Emotions


During the divorce process, the legal issues are often complicated due to the difficult emotions that each of the parties experience during divorce.  Unlike many other types of legal issues, divorce is particularly personal as it involves factors that are close to the parties’ hearts, including their children, their livelihood and their property.  While emotions should not be stuffed inside, a New York divorce attorney can offer suggestions on handling these complex emotions.  There are many times during the process of divorce in which the parties may need to be able to express themselves appropriately, such as during negotiations or in mediation.  A New York divorce attorney may advise: 

Focus on Interests

During divorce, it is easy to concentrate on what seem like important issues but that really do not have a long-lasting impact on the parties’ futures.  By thinking about the big picture and what you would like to accomplish in your settlement, you may be able to put your feelings in perspective and see how they may be affecting your stance while in negotiations or mediation.  

Identify Hot Button Issues

Most people have certain “hot buttons” that will make them angry or otherwise stall communications.  For example, this may be one parent bringing up past wrongs, threatening time lost with the children or insulting him or her.  Another potential hot button issue may be criticizing the other party’s parenting skills, family, spending or work ethic.  After spending intimate time together, most spouses have identified these hot button issues and may try to exploit such weaknesses at a meaningful point in time in the process.  While it is understandable that these types of attacks may trigger negative reactions, emotions should not dictate your actions or words.  Instead, realize that the other party may try to use this against you and plan not to react.  This allows you to keep your cool and negotiate from a reasonable standpoint.

Identify Hot Button Issues

Most people have certain “hot buttons” that will make them angry or otherwise stall communications.  For example, this may be one parent bringing up past wrongs, threatening time lost with the children or insulting him or her.  Another potential hot button issue may be criticizing the other party’s parenting skills, family, spending or work ethic.  After spending intimate time together, most spouses have identified these hot button issues and may try to exploit such weaknesses at a meaningful point in time in the process.  While it is understandable that these types of attacks may trigger negative reactions, emotions should not dictate your actions or words.  Instead, realize that the other party may try to use this against you and plan not to react.  This allows you to keep your cool and negotiate from a reasonable standpoint.

These are just a couple of ways in which your New York divorce attorney can counsel and advise you so that you can manage the ups and downs of your emotions throughout the divorce process. 

Contact Sabra Law Group, PLLC at 646-472-7971 to get started.


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