How to Have a Peaceful Low Stress Divorce
If you have ever come across any friends that were going through a divorce and can recall how they described their divorce as the most stressful life event they have ever had to deal with in their life; then you probably want to know how to make your divorce more peaceful and less stressful.
It is best to determine what your overall goals are for maintaining an amicable long-term relationship for the sake of the children. Make a list of all the lifestyle aspects of your relationship that you want to maintain. Then prepare a budget that details out expenses that you both currently have to maintain your current lifestyle and providing care for the children.
Regarding assets, you may want to start dividing them between the two of you, or wait until the terms of the divorce settlement are reached. Whatever you each decide, maintain records as the better records you keep, the smoother the divorce process will go.
Some people want to start separating bank accounts so that your spouse cannot access your money and come to an agreement on how the finances will be handled and who will pay for what. In the alternative, whether you and your spouse are still residing together, you may each agree to maintain the status quo, paying for rent, mortgage, food, education for your children and your ordinary expenses until your divorce terms are finalized.
If you feel yourself getting agitated with your spouse, take some time for yourself and get out of the house. It is best to take time for yourself every day and do something that makes you happy. The less stressed you are, the easier it will be to have a meaningful conversation with your spouse and come to an agreement rather than fighting over issues.
If you need a break from the children and your spouse, try to take a day or two for yourself and see if you can find a babysitter or if your family can watch the children while you destress. Sometimes, even something as simple as taking a long drive and getting away for a day can take away your tension and when you do get back in town, you may have a better perspective on particular situations.
Above all, avoid yelling at your spouse or pointing blame; there are always two parties involved in a divorce, so your spouse may also have things that they would like to blame you for. Remain calm and respectful when you are communicating with your spouse. It is also best to have “divorce conversations” when the children are not around.
Getting divorced is not an easy process whether or not you try to do it harmoniously or through litigation. Getting emotional support from a professional such as a life or relationship coach, therapist, or psychologist, will give you the space to vent, share your feelings, and work through your emotions so that when the divorce is finalized you can step forward into the next chapter of your life and build something new that excites you.
Consider Mediation for a Peaceful Low Stress Divorce
Contact the Sabra Law Group today for a confidential consultation regarding your divorce by calling (646) 472-7971 and to learn about our Harmonious Divorce System.