How Divorce Can Be Amicable
When two people decide not to stay together, the break-up can be quite contentious. Many spouses feel wronged and betrayed once divorce is impending. One spouse may be feeling hurt, anger or resentment toward the other spouse and acceptance that the relationship is over can be tough. These are some of the reasons why divorce may be one of the most contentious forms of law. However, there are several ways that spouses can focus on having an amicable divorce.
A mediated or collaborative divorce has many advantages over a typical adversarial divorce. In collaborative divorce, spouses focus on aligning their interests and cooperating on solutions. They are each separately represented by attorneys who advocate for them in a collaborative process – that is not adversarial. Like in a real estate transaction where each side wants the same outcome – the seller wants to sell the property to the buyer who wants to buy the property. In a collaborative divorce, each spouse wants to get out of the marriage and reach an amicable resolution. The attorneys for each spouse help their client understand their interest and possible outcomes so that they can make decisions in the outcome of the divorce in a collaborative, collective way. This type of divorce is particularly important for individuals who must maintain a relationship after the divorce, such as parents or business partners.
One distinct advantage of an amicable divorce is that the cost to get divorced tend to be lower than a litigated divorce with numerous motions and court appearances. When the spouses must go to court in order to resolve every issue that comes up, legal costs and fees go up. Likewise, more time is taken up for each separate battle. An amicable divorce helps the parties communicate together so that they do not have to rely on legal counsel as much. This helps them minimize the amount of money that they must each pay to their respective family law attorney.
Another advantage of an amicable divorce is that spouses can work on solutions that truly work for them and their family, taking into account the full picture. When issues are litigated in front of a judge, the parties are “stuck” with the decision of the judge who will make his/her decision as best they can with the limited information that could practicably be presented to the court. An amicable divorce can enable the parties to reach unique decisions that are better for their family, whether, for example, it is a different way to divide assets or a parenting schedule that takes both of the parents’ work schedules into consideration.
Spouses who are able to have an amicable divorce may be able to resolve later issues that may arise. In litigious cases, spouses may have to pursue new motions in court to ask the judge to modify a previous order. An amicable divorce may require that the spouses mediate or go through an alternative process if something in the agreement is not quite working or there has been a change in circumstances necessitating a modification.
If you would like to determine whether an amicable divorce may be right for you, please contact our office now at 646-472-7971 to speak with an attorney who can help.
